Ambiguous Loss and Disenfranchized Grief in Adoption Breakdown: Perspectives of Adopters

Platt, Nicola and Vowles, Eleanor and Wrench, Elizabeth and Machin, Laura L. (2026) Ambiguous Loss and Disenfranchized Grief in Adoption Breakdown: Perspectives of Adopters. Journal of Loss and Trauma. ISSN 1532-5024

Abstract

Adoption breakdown occurs when a child leaves the adoptive family home prematurely. Although only a minority of adoption placements end prematurely, breakdown has a profound impact on all involved and a period of grieving often follows the loss of a child from the family home. For adopters, loss and grief may be prolonged and complicated by the stigma surrounding breakdown, commonly interpreted as parental failure. Such perceptions can lead to feelings of isolation and shame, often intensified by professional scrutiny, blame, or involvement in child protection investigations. This qualitative study explored adoption breakdown from the perspective of adopters, examining the nature of loss and grief associated with breakdown, its psychological impact, and adopters’ attempts to make sense of and reconstruct meaning following the experience. Nine online focus groups were conducted with 34 adopters who had experienced adoption breakdown in the UK system. Findings highlight the complex and psychologically significant nature of adopters’ loss and grief, which was exacerbated by the silence and taboo surrounding adoption breakdown. Adoptive parents described experiencing anticipatory loss prior to formal placement breakdown, characterized by a sense of psychological absence despite the child’s continued physical presence in the home. Participants also grieved the loss of the happy family life they had imagined. The study further illustrates how adopters sought to understand the breakdown and reconstruct meaning through processes of sense-making, benefit-finding, and identity change as they adapted to new forms of parenting post-breakdown. Finally, the paper discusses implications for policy and practice.